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Tag: BDSM 101 Articles

BDSM101: Collars

What is a collar? There’s a meme circulating on Facebook showing “kinds” of collars, and frankly, it’s mostly BS. About the only “kind” of collar it got right was a posture collar, and that’s because a posture collar is designed to hold someone’s head in a very high position. A collar can be ANYTHING you…


BDSM101: I’ve never been to a BDSM club before. What can I expect?

We frequently get e-mails or FetLife messages from people who’ve never been to a BDSM club before, asking what they can expect. We can’t speak for other clubs, only for the Tampa Bay Phoenix Club, so let’s start there. We can never guarantee how many people will be present on any given night, or what…


Ask the Manager: I’m new to the lifestyle. Can I attend ______ event? #BDSM101

Q: I’m new to the lifestyle. Can I attend _____________ event? A: (Short answer.) YES. (Long answer.) YES. 🙂 (See how easy that is?) While we do have some specialty nights, yes, you can attend. Just make sure you’re 18 or older, and bring your vaild photo ID that also has your date of birth…


BDSM 101: Dungeon/Event Etiquette.

I am on the DM staff at the Tampa Bay Phoenix Club. After helping DM at a large fetish event that I have attended multiple times in the past as a guest, I realized that there are a LOT of people out there who consider themselves fetishists, but who are totally clueless (or worse, who…


BDSM 101: BDSM Tip Sheet for Beginners

Articles graphic.

This is a great article for people new to BDSM by Lady Green and Jay Wiseman. BDSM Tip Sheet for Beginners. (Leads to external site.)


Consent Matters.

Consent Matters.


BDSM 101: What do I wear?

Q: I’m new. What do I wear to a BDSM club? This is going to sound like a smart-assed answer, but I swear it’s not: clothes. LOL Seriously. Here at the Tampa Bay Phoenix Club, our dress code is that you need to be street-legal through the door. What does that mean? It means when…


What is “FemDom Friday”?

I identify as a Dominant female. And here at the Tampa Bay Phoenix Club, we run a regular event called “FemDom Friday.” (Usually every third Friday, but make sure to check our Calendar to verify it’s on the schedule.) But what does that mean? “What is FemDom Friday?” “How do you meet FemDoms?” “What happens?” “Can…


BDSM101: Will I be “safe?”

“Will I be ‘safe’ if I come to an event at ____?” “I don’t have a collar. Will someone grab me and start playing with me?” These are questions I’ve heard too many times to count. (Thank you, poorly researched romance books by vanilla writers, and clips at BDSM porn sites.) You can fill in…


BDSM101: “Am I too _____ for BDSM?”

“Am I too _____ for BDSM?” tl;dr answer: No.* *As long as the ___ question isn’t “young.” You must be at least 18 years old, or whatever the age of legal adulthood is in your place of residence. I get this question at least once a week from readers who’ve discovered my Suncoast Series books…